If you’ve looked at my previous post on face eating people (just use Zombie-B-Gone), I called this one right.
People selling bath salts should be sued for truth in advertising. They need to tell people that they will go insane, rip off their clothes and be a terrible menace to themselves and their friends until they are sedated and held down by eight police officers. Hoo boy, what a great trip? Why would you do that to yourself?
If I was a police officer, I would seriously be asking for maximum penalties for anyone selling this stuff. It turns a human being into a berserker. That’s what we need to change the name to: Berserker Salts. Then people at least know the kind of “high” they’ll be experiencing.
Truthfully, if you want to live in hell for a few hours, get a round trip ticket to any of the world’s slums or conflicts. You can walk around in the slum, get beat up and shot at, and bring post cards back. It’s just like bath salts but you can skip the whole “Satan whispering in my ear” soundtrack.
- Reports: Miami cannibal attacker may have been high on ‘bath salts’ (kdvr.com)
- You: Bath Salts Had Role in Face-Eating? (thedailybeast.com)
- Reports: Miami Cannibal Attacker May Have Been High on ‘Bath Salts’ (fox8.com)
- Reports: Miami ‘zombie’ attacker may have been using ‘bath salts’ (news.blogs.cnn.com)
- If You Use Drugs, You Might End Up Eating Someone’s Face (reason.com)
- Cannibal In Florida Believed To Have Been High On “Bath Salts” (jonathanturley.org)
- Did Face Eating Suspect Take Bath Salts Before Attack? (myteensavers.wordpress.com)
- Bath Salts May Be Involved In Face Eating Attack (homedrugtestkit.wordpress.com)
- 10 Terrifying Reasons Why You Should NEVER Get High On Bath Salts (buzzfeed.com)
- Officals claim Miami #Zombie, Rudy Eugene, ingested ‘bath salts’ (mccannexposure.wordpress.com)